Modelling
Part three of the series. I guess this one represents the elements of boredom and melancholy we’re experiencing while isolated. Although I’m a homebody anyway and I normally am quite comfortable staying in for days at a time, having the element of choice taken away certainly affects you mentally and what seemed an easy task can end up dragging on.
The second addition to the new self-portrait series I’m working on.
As I explained in my last post, I’ve challenged myself to publish a series of self-portraits while in isolation due to Covid19. The portraits look to portray the emotions I’m feeling during this time - vulnerability, loneliness, fear, unease, hope, etc. As well as act as an opportunity to challenge myself creatively. They’re unlike other self-portraits I’ve published in the past as I’m truly trying to show a more raw and vulnerable side to myself through this work. It’s an exciting challenge for me and something to help keep my mind occupied during the pandemic.
So, like most of the world, we’re currently under quarantine. Although Mexico hasn’t introduced a mandatory lockdown yet, they’re discouraging people from going out when it’s not necessary, and just to be safe we’ve chosen to self-isolate.
I’m very lucky in that I can continue to work from home as normal, but I’ve found myself with a bit of extra spare time so I’m challenging myself to shoot a self-portrait series during this isolation period. Some shoots (like this first one) I’ve chosen to include my partner Emmanuel, but most shoots I think i’ll be doing alone. For one thing,I just want to keep myself busy and with something to focus on, but I also thought it would be a good opportunity to challenge myself to try new techniques or concepts that I haven’t had a chance to do yet.
So, here we go. Self-portrait from isolation number one! Drop a comment below with any suggestions of concepts or ideas you’d like to see me try.
It was something I’d probably secretly dreamed of but never dared to say out loud. I feel so lucky to have had the opportunity and to have had such a nice experience in what can be a pretty brutal industry.
So, recently I have been posting photos from my first modelling shoot, and as I post the last set of photos I wanted to just talk about my overall experience and opinion of how I felt it all went.
First of all, I was expecting to be more nervous. I was excited to be doing something new and when I was a child I dreamed of being an actress so getting in front of the camera as a model felt like a sneak peek into that world. However, I still thought that once it came to it I’d be a nervous wreck. In the past when my anxiety was bad I could never have dreamed of being able to do something like this, so to be able to do it and not feel anxious at all was an amazing feeling. That alone felt like an achievement. The photographer and stylist Iker and Melina made me feel so calm and at ease from the get-go, they were super friendly and professional and give me a clear outline of what they were looking for, what kind of poses and facial expressions they wanted as well as the overall “vibe” so that made it a million times easier for me.
I also wasn’t sure how safe I would feel. I’d never met these people before, we’re in a foreign country where I don’t speak the language and going to parts of the city I’d never been to. So with the photographer’s permission, I took my husband along. Turns out I didn’t need to, I felt completely safe and comfortable, but I think he liked getting to be a fly on the wall regardless.
The only negative part of the experience actually came much later. A few weeks after the shoot, once the pictures were ready, the stylist posted the photos on Instagram. Immediately, her inbox was filled with men asking for my details and even offering to pay her to be introduced to me. This was definitely something I wasn’t expecting. I thought I’d get some negative comments, maybe people laughing at me a bit for thinking I can be a model, but not this. Maybe I’m naive. The photographer warned me and Emmanuel in advance, that once the photos go live I’d be contacted by other photographers wanting to work with me and to be cautious about who I trust, so I was prepared for that, but this? Not at all. The stylist was great at warding them off and ultimately protecting me and my privacy, but it’s definitely put a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth for moving forward.
Ultimately, I really enjoyed myself and I’m so impressed and the end results. So I think i’ll give it another go in the future if the right opportunity presents itself. You never know.
On that note, I’ve joined a modelling agency. Check out my profile card here
